By Richard Rushfield
Grub Street connected the dots to what be the most important news to shake LA dining since Kourtney Kardashian invented the Cap’n Crunch and Nutella Milkshake: Roland Emmerich director of such ham fisted, quasi-enviro parable blockbusters as 2012, The Day After Tomorrow, Independence Day and Godzilla, is opening a restaurant on Sunset Blvd.
The blog discovered that the auteur’s name has been appended to the liquor license for Hollywood recently shuttered Moroccan themed restaurant Dar Maghreb, implying it will soon reopen under the stewardship of Emmerich and the auteur of West Hollywood’s beloved mechanical bull riding destination, the Saddle Ranch.
One can only dream of what sort of food Emmerich will serve. We picture a menu that makes little sense in English but reads perfectly in translation, a seemingly endless first course which tediously establishes every ingredient on the plate with signs reading “This is basil!”, followed by an entree of pieces of every other entree that has ever been served mashed up and placed in a huge stack overflowing the plate and spilling down onto the floor followed by a note informing you that your dessert has been donated to Greenpiece. With an amuse bouche of Harvey Fierstein. While Oliver Platt plans with the top one percent of Americans to feed the poor to Godzilla. We can’t wait!