ONE MORE NAIL IN THE COFFIN OF PRINT

Horrifying news, courtesy of the LA Weekly, which reports that bed-bugs have been confirmed to be roaming the stacks of the Los Angeles Central Library:

“ At least two bed-bugs have been spotted at L.A. Central Library in the last month — one on August 9, crawling across a reference desk in the Science & Technology Department, and one on Labor Day, crawling across the page of the latest True Blood novel that had been checked out by an anonymous library patron.

This is a tragic development. Bed-bugs are no laughing matter (witness Native Angeleno friend/muse Molly McAleer’s first-hand account of dealing with the scourge if you don’t believe us). The glorious Central Library is one of the most magical places in the city and, perhaps, the only tolerable oasis left in the gastropub-laden nightmare that has become Downtown L.A. As news of this crisis spreads (KCBS is already amping up the hysteria), we fear the library will become a desolate I Am Legend-esque wasteland.

There is, however, one tiny silver lining in this report, at least if you’re a Sookie Stackhouse fan. Queried about the infestation, a library employee responded:

‘We’ve had reports [of bed bugs] from all over the place. We’re spraying all over. But we hadn’t heard they’d gotten to Literature yet.’

Hear that, True Blood fans? You no longer have to hide your head in shame while indulging your favorite guilty-pleasure. No less an authority than an actual librarian has officially weighed in: you’re not reading trash, you’re reading LITERATURE! Take that, book snobs.

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