Nature is Angry  

Hippie Musicians and Dangerous Predators: A Homegrown Southern California Recipe for Disaster

By Richard Rushfield

Shocking news emerged this week from the Mammoth Lakes area, where researches have determined that bears have been lured out from the woods into civilization by local hippie musicians.

The threat of hippie musicians to this city has been well documented.  Drum circles were long ago demonstrated to be one of the greatest public safety threats the city confronts, and only thanks to the iron grip of the all-powerful hippie lobby have they remained legal.  But while in the past hippie ensembles have limited their mayhem driving the public to self-destruction, never before have they be proven to be in league with mankind’s most ancient and fearsome foe: wild fanged animals.

The Mammoth Times broke the story,  as reported by Steve Searless, a wildlife expert:

“There were two gentlemen, still in their, um, sleeping gear, on their deck playing didgeridoos,” he said.
  In front of them, on the grass, was a passive bear, who seemed to be enjoying the impromptu concert.
“Did you call this to 911?” Searles asked, his incredulity on the rise.
 No, they said, it was one of their wives, who is prone to panic and familiar with placing 911 calls.
Searles said he mulled that over for about a half-second, then asked them what they were doing out there on the deck, at 6:30 a.m., playing didgeridoos. One of the men shrugged.
“The bears seem to like it,” Searles said one of the men replied.
 Remarkably, and all too predictably, the hippies were not arrested and remain at large, free to summon beasts to act of destruction at will.